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stelly maria | female |
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Friday, September 12, 2003
to where you are 
"death is a challenge. it tells us not to waste time...it tells us to tell each other right now that we love each other."(leo f. buscaglia)

today i heard about the death of one pastor i know. time and time again, in many little ways, i am reminded that life is short.

i've heard this statement several times that we should live each day as if it were our last. for me, it means that i would do things just because i'm fun of doing them, i would share kindness to all those around me, i would take more risks, i would try to accomplish my wishes... in one word: LIVE. *well, hope i can really put them into action*

there's one josh groban's song which is dedicated to anyone who has had to deal with the death of a loved one. the lyrics were written by linda thompson (david foster's wife) and the music was composed by richard marx.

"To Where You Are"

Who can say for certain
Maybe you're still here
I feel you all around me
Your memories so clear

Deep in the stillness
I can hear you speak
You're still an inspiration
Can it be (?)
That you are mine
Forever love
And you are watching over me from up above

Fly me up to where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile to know you're there
A breath away's not far
To where you are

Are you gently sleeping
Here inside my dream
And isn't faith believing
All power can't be seen

As my heart holds you
Just one beat away
I cherish all you gave me everyday
'Cause you are mine
Forever love
Watching me from up above

And I believe
That angels breathe
And that love will live on and never leave

*in loving memory of pastor alex paat*


stelly @ 4:48 PM


Thursday, September 11, 2003
have a bountiful life! 
for quite some time i've choosed not to play safe in my life. i always cherish new encounter and new relationship. i open myself to people who appreciate me, care about me and want to know me. what is most essential for me is that i enjoy sharing time and experiences, friendship, romance, or whatever with that person... i find myself relaxed, laughing, sharing whatever is important to me and feeling refreshed afterwards.

there was once in my lifetime when i met this guy. he was warm, very kind to me, interesting, funny, and around in my day-to-day activities. the more i got to know him, the more i became attracted. though i know he had a girlfriend already, i didn't avoid meeting him regularly - nor did he as he always tried to spent more time with me. we enjoyed speaking to each other *a lot*. for me, it's the moment that counts... that cannot be replaced by anything else. though at last he has his own path and i have mine, i always cherish the time spent with him as beautiful memories which i would never regret. what an empty life that would be if i avoid knowing him more - just because i know we aren't destined to be together.

i think we all deserve those special moments to live a full and rich life. just enjoy this moment, today, and don't worry too much about the future... because what if tomorrow never come...?

stelly @ 11:50 PM


Tuesday, September 09, 2003
time really does fly! 
how fast time flies! this morning when i remembered to wish "happy birthday" to a friend, it seemed just like a while ago i wished him the same. some people said, the older u get the faster it goes. a year as a child seems like a life time but as an adult it seems like never enough time. the shift comes so gently we don't notice the progression until we look back and realize we are already in a different place in our life.

unfortunately, we sometimes forget to just stop once a while ... to smell the fresh ground after raining, to look at the stars in the sky and wonder what it is like up there, to relax and listen to the music ... we sometimes take for granted the very people close to us, just because they are so close. we sometimes don't have enough time to talk to our family, to just sit with them and cherish the time we have together. we sometimes forget to ask our friend "how are you?" and give them a little attention.

our world is just getting too complicated. we are all in a hurry and have thousand of things running in our brains all the day. we should remind ourselves not to dance too fast. cause ... life is short.

stelly @ 2:26 PM


Friday, September 05, 2003
enjoy your life! 
i was overwhelmed with grief when i heard my friend's story about how he broke up with his girlfriend. it brought me back to my own ending-relationship memories which were of course belong to those unhappy parts of my life. saying goodbye to someone who is already very close to us, who has become a part of our life, who has filled up our days with his company ... is not easy at all. but hey, for each door closing, another reopens. for each dying relationship, another will be sparked. just be prepared to flourish your new love.

on a happier note, my friend called me this morning just to tell me that only now when he has married that he could understand and support my view on marriage issues. *i have this opinion that i don't have to marry someone only because it's already the time or because it's simply the goal of everyone's life. for me, marry or not, i believe i can still enjoy my life. if i don't see marriage as a promising new life, why rush to make the commitment?* the marriage life opened my friend's mind that wedding is not the answer to have a happier life. *seee, i told u before!* so he gave me this little advise : enjoy life. whatever u're doing, doing it with fun. don't put over expectation on someone and don't expect too much so u'll never get disappointed. appreciate the blessings u have and anything good happens in your life.

yap, that's the key - ENJOY YOUR LIFE! have a positive thinking on everything. joy and have fun! god loves us so much that he presents us with so many beautiful things and sends us so many kind people around us as his angels. they are people who have touched us in a special way, changed us, and inspired us so deeply. i have a long list myself... my ex who cares enough to call; my 'next-door' friend who picked me up yesterday, brought me the dinner and 'entertained' me in his home *even in annoying ways sometimes*; my close male friend who called at midnight just to ask me how i'm doing; my other close female friend who sent me "morning sms" today - how's your life? *aren't those all sooo sweet?*

to all of you who have surfed your way to this page, i wish you a chance to be happy, to smile, to have a sincere love, and to have angels on your side.

things don't end, they only beginand to make an endingis to make a beginning

stelly @ 1:08 PM